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What is in a fate?
Hi, loves! February was a whirlwind of a month. I hope it was kind to you and everything you wanted it to be.
For me, it was a month of change. As my undergraduate career comes to a close, I’m looking at the next step forward. I’ve applied to graduate programs, and I’ve been accepted into 2. I’m still waiting on responses from 4 more. University has never felt traditional to me, nuanced by attending Early College in high school and coming back to finish my degree during the pandemic. But moving forward, accomplishing what I set out to do and finding that next step, is something I’ve wanted for a long time.
In giving myself the most opportunities, I applied to a small variety of programs: English, one creative writing MFA, and Classics. I’ll soon be holding a BA in English and a BIS in Classics, so that need to pursue both is lingering. But I know what my ultimate passion is: writing. And no matter what, I need to remember that.
If I trust myself, then I know I’ll do the work I’m meant to do and I’ll find the path I’m meant to be on.
THIS VICIOUS GRACE by Emily Thiede
Do you ever begin reading a book and immediately want to scream because of how pretty the prose is? Yeah, this is that book. I’m only 30 pages in, but I’m enchanted by the prose and the premise of the plot. If you’ve got any fantasy recommendations, I’m all ears. I’m on an escapism kick this month.
On Writing a Beginning
On attempting to create the strongest draft of Robin WIP, I reassessed the opening chapter. I reworked it as to lay the foundation of who Wendy is as a princess and who she wants to be. That tension is central to her development, and is brought into question several times throughout the novel.
Wendy sees her title first before she sees herself. Being a princess, to Wendy, is essential to her worth. But what if Wendy could be someone else—someone without the weight of a kingdom on her heart?
Edits are slow-going right now (thanks, grad apps), but I’m still grateful for the progress I’m making and I’m trusting the process.
On Creating a Life Outside of Literature (And Coming Back to It, Anyway)
The last requirement of finishing undergrad is completing my honors research thesis. No surprise, I’ve chosen to research romantic tragedies. I’m tracing how Ancient Greek tragedy plays have influenced modern tragic literature, with particular note to romance tragedies. As a romantic at heart and in my own writing, this niche interest is dear to me. On a serious note, it’s also important. Romance and tragedy both play a vital role in contemporary literature and life. I can only hope that the research I do contributes to what it means to create a romantic tragedy, and that other literary theorists are encouraged to pursue their own niche interests.
What is in a Fate?
Life is an endless series of changes, loss, growth, and rebirth. What hurts now won’t forever. What you love now might be lost. What you want might not be what you want in ten years—or maybe you’ll discover something you want more. There is little certainty, and yet I think about Fate a lot.
I believe in purpose—in the sense that we have to discern its meaning for ourselves. Are we on a set path? No, likely not. But isn’t there beauty in pursuing a passion anyway, knowing life is ever-changing? What I wanted at 18 is different than what I wanted at 20, or now at 24. And that’s okay. But do you know what’s stayed with me? My love for writing. And while I don’t entirely what my purpose is, I do believe writing is part of it. And my fate is to write regardless of what the rest of my fate might be.
That love, and passion, stays with me. I hope you find your passion, purpose, fate—whatever you want to name it. And I hope you’re kind to yourself when life isn't.
Thank you for reading Sweetbitter. Stay beautiful.